Falling Slowly
nowplaying: Falling Slowly - Chester See feat Savannah Outen
I am a curious person.
A very, curious person.
Plus the fact that I can think of so many things at one time,
makes that fact even scarier sometimes.
I don't know about you.
But have you ever met someone,
and somehow,
the more you talk to the person,
the more you realize that you want to get to know about them even more?
You want to know what makes them happy;
who is the most important person in their life;
what are their innermost secret that they have never told anyone.
You want to know it all.
Then, you get to know them a little bit more,
because they are willing to tell you a little bit more than what you have known before.
And after that,
you find yourself getting even more excited to know about them more.
But somehow, the other person somewhat got cold feet.
Or so it seems.
Perhaps it was due to their past, that they are scared to reveal a little bit more.
But I don't blame them either.
After meeting so many people who takes your heart, tore it into pieces, and left you to do the picking up after that, one would be careful to whom they should give away their heart and soul to;
to whom should they trust their innermost thoughts to.
If only I could tell the other person,
that I don't expect anything in return.
I just want to know them more,
and understand them even more,
in a deeper sense,
would that scare them away?
I want to make the move,
but every time I talk about this to those who are close to me, they advice me not to really pursue it.
"Because you are a girl. Why are you the one pursuing it?"
Another time I even scare myself of,
scared that I am moving ahead of God's willing.
Because the last time I did that (I think I did that),
whatever efforts I made goes to dust.
Should I be blame for me being scared also?
I don't like the word "if", but it is playing in my head a lot lately.
Even though there's good signs (or at least I think it is),
somehow something stopped me from pursuing it.
But I cannot stop thinking about this person.
The more I think about it,
the more I realize that I really want to get to know this person.
How do I get to know a person,
who is afraid of something,
afraid of expectations,
when all I want,
is nothing more than a friendship?
Because I like the way this person thinks,
I like the way this person carries himself,
and I like that this person is not afraid of being different from the rest of the people out there?
HOW?
