nowplaying: Up - Olly Murs feat Demi Lovato

I really count my blessings, every single day.

Without fail before I sleep, I will always thank God for whatever that's happened 

during the day.

Be it a colleague of mine managed to protect a life, or someone's life is change because of me (somehow);

even the smallest thing such as a beautiful weather or getting to eat one chocolate bar 

(yup, that is how obsessed I am with chocolates)

And you know what?

I forgot the last time I feel so emotional.

I am a very emotional person;

this blog is indeed the proof of it. 

Nowadays, when I read back the archives of my blog (as early as 2012),

there are times that I actually cringed and I asked myself,

"WHY ON EARTH DID I WROTE ALL THOSE?"

"OMG YOU ONE EMOTIONAL WOMAN!!!"

*insert the laughing-until-tears-come-out emoji here*

Yesterday afternoon, as I was driving back from the airport after a great chat with Aunty Eileen,

I was thinking to myself, 

"WHAT DO I REALLY WANT TO DO IN MY LIFE?"

Now allow me to tell you to what has been happening in my dull life for the past eight months:

JANUARY - sat for my FINAL, final exam of my university years.
Kumang's day out. Highlight of the day: helped Tina prepare her wedding playlist.
Celebrated a quiet birthday with the soul sister and her sister.
Celebrated CNY and my belated birthday with the family (including Uncle Joe's who flied all the way from Miri to be with us).

FEBRUARY - Jobless.
Attended PRUCheese program done by Aunty Eileen's team. Definitely an eye opener experience.
Celebrated Valentine's Day with the best friend by going on a girly girl night out at The Library.
Received an offer to become a relief teacher at SMK Batu Lintang for one month. Or so it seems.

MARCH - Officially become a relief teacher at SMK Batu Lintang. Oh, btw, I teach History for Form 4 and Form 6. *yes, yawn away*
Got a confirmation letter from UNIMAS that I will be graduating this year. Woots!
Sat for pre-contact exam and passed.
Hang out with Vic, Rachel, Achis and Jess and got the invitation card for Tina's wedding.

APRIL - Still a relief teacher as I got extended TWICE in the month.
Gain a realization that healthy lifestyle is the way after the school's sports day, so I started to jog every evening.

MAY - Back to being jobless.
Managed to loss some weight after jogging and crash diet.
Helped Aunty Eileen and her team at UITM when they opened up a career drive booth.
Tina's wedding.
Had a fling (nothing sexual though).

JUNE - Gawai! Foods galore. *yeap, you guess it, I gained back all the weight I lost in May.*
Little brother entered UITM for diploma. How did time flies so fast?
Sat for CEILLI exam.
Started to apply for more jobs.
Helped Elly to move out from her rental house.

JULY - Sent Elly to the airport, where she is going back to Sabah for good.
Passed my CEILLI exam.
Got a call to attend an interview from the many jobs that I've applied.
Met Aunty Eileen and she had offered a work opportunity with her team.
Got another call from the interviewer that I managed to go through the second round of interview.

AUGUST - Went for the second interview, and out of the 50 people from the first interview, I was among the 9 people selected, and the first three people out of the 9 of the second round interview.
Finally talked to Aunty about that work opportunity with her team.


Oh, let me tell you about the second round of interview.
The job that I interviewed for is a sales job, therefore, for the second interview, us candidates were asked to pitch a sale on any product of our choice.
I was asked to come on Monday, along with another two candidates, I was the second presenter.
While I was waiting for my turn to present, my heart beats fast, but it's not really because I'm nervous.
Maybe because I just want to present and get over with.
I get that all the time before doing a presentation.
When it was my turn to present, I just went in front, and just started to talk, like how I would talk to my friends, acquaintances, or course mates.
I feel the adrenaline rush from just, talking, engaging with people.
I feel so, alive.
Sure the interviewer, along with his senior workers who were there to evaluate us, tried to ask hard questions just to throw me off; that is what they are supposed to do.
They want to see if these people that they interview, are the right people for the job, especially, if it is a sales job.
But I can say, that I managed to answer every single question that they throw at me, in confidence (although the answer might not be the right one haha).
This exposure, is something that I had learnt when I did my internship with Aunty.
So if you asked me, do you think I could get the job,
my answer would be, if the interviewer had to choose the best of the best from all the three interview sessions,
I can say I know I am the best for my session (I've seen the other two candidates' presentation, and I can safely say, I did better than them, not being over confident here, but, you get me), and I think I can be among the three that got selected for the job.

Now, the job opportunity with Aunty Eileen.
Aunty Eileen is *how do I put this delicately, in a way not to scare you people about it* involve in the financial planning business, working under a big, prominent, financial institution.
I got to know her as my intern manager, but as time passes, I still keep in touch with her because I find her very inspiring, especially that she wants to help as much as she can with our Bumiputera people.
Every time she is in town, be it for a project or work purposes, I somehow always managed to be wherever she is.
Even if it is only for a few hours, I am always there.
And after finally talking about her plans of bringing me into her team yesterday (she had been talking about this since March, it was during the time I became a relief teacher), I can safely say, I was intrigued.
I have been with her team (although not as a person who properly working with them) for a while now, and I enjoyed being around these people.
They are fun to be with and very professional when it comes to their job.
I get to meet new people every time, without fail, which is something that I enjoy actually.

Father Felix's sermon for today:

"When we pray to God, we expect God to answer our prayers quickly.

In actual fact, He answers our prayer, each one of them.

But, most of the time, He answers our prayer by wanting us to

WAIT"

A really good self reminder to everyone (including me), 

especially when we are at the verge of saying

"Why God doesn't answer my prayer?"

By the time you guys are done with reading this post, I'm sure you will realized that this post might not be related to the title. Yes, I purposely put that title for that is what I am currently feeling right now. 

I SECOND THIS. Enough said. 

You know what?

After proofreading this post, I guess the title is somehow related to what I'm writing here. 

Expectation, is the root of all heartache

In another four days, we will say goodbye to the month of June and hello to the month of July. I wonder if anybody had realize, half of 2013 is now gone. Because I just realize it only today, after looking at the date. It's either I'm oblivious to the date but actually, I am living a life. As a student. And as time passes, I realize that we actually grow more mature.. In many ways you never thought you would.

You see, before this (I'm gonna make a confession here), I am not a patient person. I really am not one. If my patience is tested even just for a bit, I snapped easily. Usually, it so happens that I snapped at people whenever:

And since waiting is also another process of patience, I can safely say that I hate waiting as well. 

However, somehow, in 2013, things change. I don't snapped easily, despite of having not enough sleep at night. And when things don't go my way, I just stop for a while and think, by being angry will it help to solve whatever that is happening. When I realize it doesn't help, I stop being angry. When things don't go my way, I pray to God to thank Him for whatever that is happening because perhaps it is His way to tell me, it is not my day. 

And to tell you the truth, I did not realize this first. Rachel and Mijot did. Yes, I can be oblivious at times. Haha.

So, to many impatient people out there, who are just like me (before), I hope that you learn to be patient because by being patient, you won't be angry. And trust me, being an angry person drains away your energy. Trust me, I know. 

Today when I log in to my Facebook after a very slow day at Aunty La's place, I stumble upon this photo, posted by my mum. At first, I just scroll down and didn't think it would make sense, but upon watching Blue Bloods, somehow this made sense. Read and understand, and try to be in your mother's shoes. Would you be able to do whatever she has done for you? 

I may not be a mother, NOT YET. But I know, I may not be able to be half the mother that mummy has been for the three of us. All these years, I was not a good daughter to mummy. God knows what bad things I did to her. But being in the university, somehow taught me that sometimes, things are not what they seems and that whatever they had done, they do it for they want to keep us safe from any harm. Nothing more. It may not be Mother's day, don't get me wrong. But, I don't think it is wrong to do a post about my mum. This is one way for me to express my appreciation towards her. For now, I am still living with her so I may take things for granted but someday, I know I will be away from her. Working maybe, or maybe I decided to stay with my husband's family (if my husband decides that we should stay with the family that is), we will never know. And when that day comes, I do not want to be the child who says, "mum was right," or "I should have listened to mama," or any other phrases that most said when they finally realized what their mother had done for them, which may have (unintentionally) made them despised their own mother. 

So dear people out there, treat your mother right, just the way that they had treated you for when they are gone, whatever you do may be worthless and pointless. And this post also serve as a reminder to myself that I should treat mummy as she treated me, although sometimes we have misunderstandings, but then it is only for my own good. 

Till then,

Marcy.

Xoxo.

Sure, making plans are essential in order for you not to be swayed away from your original purposes in life. But believe me, no matter how bullet proof your plan is, remember that God is more powerful than you and I are.  He knows what's best for us, and sometimes, what you think is best for you may not actually be the best for you. He gave you something else so that you realize of the finer things in life. 

And the gift of friendship is the best thing that has ever happened in my life. I am blessed with seven (including Hany) sisters from different parents. They know who they are; and they had made my journey on this Earth worthwhile. Life can be hard at times, and when life kicks you hard, it gave you friends. Best friends to be exact. I really love this quote because it says that,

My name is Marcella Julan Anak Geoffrey, and I am currently studying Bachelor of Finance in Universiti Malaysia Sarawak (UNIMAS), Kota Samarahan. 

Well, something like that lah. At first, I didn't really catch what he said until (I think) he repeat that again. And so I was like, "thank you Lord for finally answer my question. You are indeed very wise, even when I don't understand it at all." It was indeed an eye opener for me, and I am really glad that I am here, doing Bachelor of Finance, and not something else like engineering (though I am in a men hunt for those who are engineers/engineers-to-be :p) or nursing. Engineering, from what I've heard from a few acquaintances of mine, is a very tough subject. No kidding. If you think our course is tough, think of these people. There are those who became a zombie after a few days of not sleeping (true story, although they don't turn into a real zombie lah). Those who are in Faculty of Engineering are another type of 'chosen' people, because they are made to be, suppose to be, and should be, strong people as most of their jobs are field jobs. That is definitely no doubt about it. While us in Finance, we can choose to be a financial analyst, financial planners, personal finance advisors, just to name a few. And most of the jobs requires us to be in an office and not going to a site to supervise a building (thank God), which is a good thing too. Though there might be cons of being in Finance industry, I guess it's alright because in the end of the day, everything has it's own pros and cons. It's just up to us how are we going to react to it. Like what my dad always said to me,

Some of you might not understand what he means by that. Me included, at first that is. But when you think about it, this saying is right in some ways, because you will never know what you are doing will give you in return. It is like a silver lining, if you can put it that way. 

*paused*

Well, that's a very lengthy explanation on what I am currently doing for another one year and a half (I hope, amen). I think I should get back to what I'm doing to, searching topics on Islamic Finance and Research Methodology. And for those of you who reads this, I hope that you won't get bored by this cause sometimes I tend to get overboard while writing (haha) but maybe you should start asking yourself (and myself included), where do you want to be in this industry in another 5 years time. Be it in the banking industry, education (by being a lecturer perhaps?), insurance etc, I wish you all the best. 

Till next time when my brain decided to hatch an idea on something to write.

Love,

Marcy.

Xoxo.

Today, while I was replying tweets to my 'twin', Parveen a.k.a Pops, I came across a tweet from Sarawak's national newspaper, the Borneo Post about the girl who was missing after the great flash flood which occur 3 weeks ago. And being the curious me, I clicked on the article (for the article please click here) and read more about it. Apparently, she was found somewhere at Muara Tebas by workers of a coal power station situated there. A few minutes after retweeting that tweet, my friend Aling replied to me about that tweet.

In a way or another, every deaths that had happen is a tragedy, no matter how the person died. But despite that, life has to go on. I remember when I was watching Downton Abbey Season 1 last night, someone had said that,