I Am A Girl
Disclaimer: photos are courtesy of Google
I am not a perfect girl.
I'm the kind of girl that when I cry, I cry.
I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure.
All I want is for YOU to LOVE ME.
I Am A Girl
CONVERSATION
Everything's gonna be alright
Two unfortunate events had happened to me within the first two days of the week. And it already had drained half of my energy needed for the rest of the week away. Snapped at someone that I shouldn't have. He tried to apologized but I guess I was still not in the mood to accept his apology nor to apologized that I snapped at him.
However, with a simple phone call from the best friend, and a simple phrase from someone saying,
"Everything's gonna be alright..."
Somehow I know that eventually, things will get better. I just had to remember that all these unfortunate event is one way for Him to make me into a better person.
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
Now, I should go to bed, clear up my fuzzy mind, pray to God for strength and hope for the best for tomorrow. Amen ++.
CONVERSATION
Mars vs Venus
Girls tend to be emotional, guys are not. Girls tend to be panic when something bad happens, guys tend to stay calm. And that is why girls tend to react to things based on their emotions, and guys managed to stay rational despite how bad the situation is. But that doesn't mean that guys don't feel bad or does not worry about their feelings. They just deal with things differently compared to us.
CONVERSATION
Other Half
I'm happy for Tina and her boyfriend,
Aida and her fiance',
May and her boyfriend,
Elly and her boyfriend,
and everyone else who has their other half.
Lucky you guys who already have your other half whom you can share your happiness, sadness, etc. I am still looking for that person who is willing to share their happiness with mine, their sadness with mine, be the reason that he smile for no reason, and be the woman behind a successful man's back.
 |
| I keep telling myself this, just to remind myself that God is good. :) |
CONVERSATION
Part of Me, a tearjerker
"Do you ever feel like a plastic bag
Drifting to the wind, wanting to start again?
Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin
Like a house of cards, one blow from caving in?"
Fireworks (Katy Perry)
We first know her from her infamous single, I Kissed (A Girl) and since then, she climbed her way up to be who she is right now. From Katy Hudson, the gospel singer, she moved to L.A when she was eighteen, all alone in the big city, to pursue her dream of becoming a singer, a performer. It got me to question myself, where and what were we doing when we were 18? This movie was really the window into Katy Perry's behind the scene life as a singer, a performer, and also, what really happened and how she coped with her failed marriage with Russell Brand. We always have this stigmata of Hollywood marriages doesn't last long because of agreements, cheating, etc. But what we don't know is that, these people are humans too. And we as humans, have feelings. So does Katy. When I saw Katy cried upon knowing that her marriage is failing, I somehow saw myself in that position. It was like deja vu all over again because I was in that position before. I remember those days when I don't feel like waking up, to just stay on bed, and if possible, to sleep for days because then I thought that my reality is a bad dream. But with the help of the right people, I manage to get back up and finally be happy, although it may not be the same happiness that I had before. And in Katy's case, she knew that she had achieved her dream of becoming a star to make her stay in the reality, despite of the hits and misses especially in her private life.
"I already have a brilliant life. All I have to do is to remind myself that I have it"
Katy Perry (Part of Me)
I am not a movie critique, and I've learnt this before in one of my English generics, English for The Real World (or now known as English In Media), and I've gotta admit, I suck at it. Sorry Madam Yvonne! You were an awesome lecturer, but I guess movie review is not my forte. This will be the first, and the last movie review that I will do in this blog (until I decide either wise that is :p), because my love for Katy Perry.
And oh, I believe in your weirdness, because I believe that each and everyone of us are weird in our own way *winks*.
P.s.
The reason I named the title of this post "Part of Me, a tearjerker" is because I did cried while watching it. And Hany too! I took the "tearjerker" part right out of her mouth so my darling, this credit is for you. *winks like a retard*
CONVERSATION
My Two Cents
*Disclaimer: I actually had made a post about Katy Perry's documentary movie, Part of Me and ranted about how my single life is somewhat miserable. But I decided not to do that; instead, I came up with this post (refer to title).*
I have this syndrome of can't seem to get myself to sleep for the very first day of a new semester. It happens for the past two semester, and today, it's happening again. So here I am, putting my thoughts into words. But that's not exactly what I want to discuss here about.
For the past three months of summer break (unfortunately for Malaysia, we only have three seasons: hot, rainy and aircond), I've been on Facebook a lot because I wanna keep in touch with my friends who are not on Twitter. They are my kumangs, as I fondly call them. However, they don't go online all the time because unlike (poor)me, they are doing their short semester over the break. So, they have to attend classes, assignments to do and of course, study for midterms and finals. But when they are online, I go online too, to either interact with them, or to play The Sims Social (and unfortunately for me, I'm hooked to that game).
And then I realized, Facebook is not what it seems anymore. It's very different to when I first sign up in 2008. Now, you can share a lot of photo quotes, which reminds me Tumblr. At first I was okay with it, because I love quotes, and as you can see, quotes are my biggest motivators. But somehow, it started to get on my nerves. I have this friend (on Facebook), who is constantly sharing photo quotes, one after another. There are times I couldn't help myself but to roll my eyes whenever he/she posted those quotes. I may be a big fan of quotes, but don't you think that sharing every single quote that you like annoys people?
And then, there are people who posted status for like, every two minutes. My first reaction towards these people are,
"haven't they heard of Twitter?"
But then again, I think to myself, if these people have Twitters, they'll be a compulsive Twitter user, where they tweet about going to take a bath or going to sleep, which is unnecessary, really.
Nobody needs to know if you have a bad day, or you got a bad haircut etc. There are some things you can share, and some things you should keep to yourself. There was this one time someone posted about being constipated (where the faeces is so hard or something. Ew!) , and I was like, "really? Who the fuck cares if you're constipated? Get yourself some fruit and be done with it!"
It just amazes me that you can be anyone on the internet, but you choose to be stupid for reasons only God knows why. Sometimes, it can also show the level of maturity that particular person has, regardless of how old that person is.
Facebook had also, allows people to create drama, which somehow is more drama than the soap operas or the sinetrons that I've seen on tv. You get what I mean? Sometimes, you can see statuses about couples who fight online (I've never witness this, even back in the days I was using my old Facebook, thank God) for all the stupid reasons. Then, there's status of girl fight, bitch fight, whatever fight. "Haters gonna hate" or "bitch, you mess with my friends, you mess with me" sorta thing, you know? C'mon people. If you have a problem with another person, why must you post in online for the whole world to know? With this border-less world, anyone and EVERYONE will know about your hatred and anger towards this person. And you might spike the anger in another person, i.e. the family, or the relatives. Instead of making your problems go away, you are inviting more problems than you should in the first place. If you have a problem or issue(s) that you need to resolve with this other person, you can do it face to face, or if you can't, you can do it on the phone, by calling the person. But if you're too broke to even by credit to reload, then just Facebook message. You don't have to spike anger in everyone, because being an angry person is just unhealthy. Believe me, I was an angry person and it drains me out. Save your energy for doing something good, like charity for example. It can bring benefits to you and the people involve.
I wish to go on and on because there are so many points that I can elaborate about this topic. But it's almost 2 a.m now and in order for me to not be cranky when I wake up in the morning, is to sleep. Thank God my classes starts at 11 a.m but it will be direct until 5 p.m so it will be (sorta) a long day for me. Therefore now, I shall bid you good day and may God bless. :)
But before that, I would like to ask,
WHICH TYPE OF FACEBOOK USER ARE YOU? ;)
CONVERSATION
Coincidence
Earlier, I found out that Vic's crush and my crush are actually coursemates! I thought her crush studied civil engineering but today, she told me that he studied mechanical and manufacturing, which is the same as my crush. So I was like, "what a pure coincidence!"
But when I think back, there were already a lot of coincidence when it comes to my situation and Vic's. That's why whenever I have issues that are related to the heart, I go to her because I know she would understand and because she is dealing with the same situation as I am.
So I guess, coincidentally I am on the right path, based on what Simon Van Booy said in his book entitled "Love Begins On Winter".
CONVERSATION
Who Is?
"Life will bring you to many places, where you'll meet new people, be in a new environment, so on and so forth. People will make you, will break you, but you must not let them break you down. But in the end of the day, you will thank all these people for eventually making you who you are, whom you are proud of."
These few days of registration has been somewhat stressful, frustrating, overwhelming. But life has taught me not to be too happy with current situation because anything can happen in a few minutes, even seconds. Luckily enough, I am patient and manage to go through registration week (today is day 3) without getting pissed at others. There are some sighs here and there, but that's all about it. Vic even had warned us earlier, not to be too happy with the current timetable, especially the core subjects because anything can change. True enough, there were changes. And again, another sigh. For those who followed me on Twitter knows that I complaint a lot, but that's only because I feel the need to express my feelings. I am an expressive person, and those who couldn't handle me, you know where you stand. I thank God every day for the circle of friends that I have now can handle me at my worst, and they indeed have seen me at my best. I don't need the world to understand why I make the decisions that I made. It's enough for me to know that there are people who understands, and not judge me.
And these are the people who leave footprints in my heart.
Speaking of footprints, I found a poem by Eleanor Roosevelt entitled Footprints In Your Heart which really suits this post and this post is dedicated to those who leave their footprints in my heart. Past and present. Words can't express how thankful I am for those who walked into my life and made me who I am today. I can only hope that my presence in your life had also made impact, even a small one will do.
FOOTPRINTS IN YOUR HEART
Many
people will walk in and out of your life,
But only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.
But only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.
To handle yourself, use
your head;
To handle others, use your heart.
Anger is only one letter short of danger.
To handle others, use your heart.
Anger is only one letter short of danger.
If someone betrays you
once, it is his fault;
If he betrays you twice, it is your fault.
Great minds discuss ideas,
Average minds discuss events,
Small minds discuss people.
He who loses money, loses much;
He who loses a friend, loses much more;
He who loses faith, loses all.
Beautiful young people are accidents of nature,
But beautiful old people are works of art.
Learn from the mistakes of others.
You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
Friends, you and me.
You brought another friend,
And then there were three.
If he betrays you twice, it is your fault.
Great minds discuss ideas,
Average minds discuss events,
Small minds discuss people.
He who loses money, loses much;
He who loses a friend, loses much more;
He who loses faith, loses all.
Beautiful young people are accidents of nature,
But beautiful old people are works of art.
Learn from the mistakes of others.
You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
Friends, you and me.
You brought another friend,
And then there were three.
We started our group,
Our circle of friends,
And like that circle -
There is no beginning or end.
Yesterday is history.
Tomorrow is mystery.
Our circle of friends,
And like that circle -
There is no beginning or end.
Yesterday is history.
Tomorrow is mystery.
Today is a gift.
That's
why it's called the present.*
CONVERSATION
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